ANGER MANAGEMENT TESTIMONIALS
Many people believe anger is the problem. More often, anger is the expression of a deeper emotional pattern. These clients describe what changed when they began to understand their reactions rather than simply trying to control them.
My anger had cost me a marriage, many relationships, friends, jobs and almost everything that mattered.
"At the age of 52 had come to a crossroad in my life. I could either keep going with my life as it was or give it one more go to change. So far, my life has been filled with anger. It had cost me a marriage, many relationships, friends, various altercations with the police, terrible road rage, and jobs. I had always been on a road to self-destruction, and it felt that I punished myself for being happy. I got married again when I was 50 and again saw this relationship ending as a fault of my anger issues and decided that I would try one last time to sort myself as I could not go through this all over again. That is when I contacted Gary after reading his testimonials online. I was very sceptical and even emailed him saying that he would not be able to cure me and would instead just take my money like so many other counsellors had done so in the past. Well I was wrong, very wrong. Things started to get better for me just after one session and by the time I completed the course, my anger issues were gone. No more road rage, no more arguments, no pent-up aggression, nothing, just calmness like I had never experienced before, and it stayed. Somehow Gary had reprogrammed my brain to think in a different way and the amazing thing was that I didn't even have to do anything, it just worked, and for that I am very grateful to Gary, in fact he saved me."
— Rob. Telford Shropshire May 2019
My anger has gone. Simply and permanently.
"I was aware for many years that I needed help in coping with the large amount of anger and defensiveness that I was carrying around. I suffered explosive anger which could be occasionally violent. I was regularly "hurt" and backed into a defensive corner, but I was so scared of traditional counselling, where I knew a lot of time was spent dwelling on the past and I knew this would only hinder me and exacerbate my problems, as it has done for so many people who have sought help through regular counselling. I went to see Gary after looking for many years for someone I thought might really help break the cycle of anger and regret that I suffered from. To say that I was cynical of any help is an understatement but I was desperate. Gary explained his methods to me, which seemed so simple that I genuinely thought this had no chance at a lasting deep change in me. After 5 minutes with Gary he had honed in on something I hadn't even spoken about to him, a time in my life which was so influential on my anger. He recognised it, pinpointed it and started to dig down to the real root of my uncontrolled rages. After 3 sessions with Gary real, permanent changes had happened to my mindset, my mood, my outlook and my acceptance to what was. His methods are very real, lasting and make absolute sense. This isn't anger management, this is a very simple, but very clever and effective way of letting the past go and realising how useless those feelings of anger are. My anger has gone. Simply and permanently. After 6 sessions I have left behind damaging aspects of my life that I had dragged around for so long. This has had a huge positive impact on all aspects of my life. My children are happier. My outlook on my career seems very clear, my partner is astounded and very grateful that my deep rooted anger no longer shadows our relationship. I'm happier. I worry less. I am able to think clearer. I like how I feel and I'm constantly coming across things which, in the past, would have triggered anger and unreasonable defensiveness in me, and I'm astounded at how I spent years ruining my life and making those around me pay for something which has been so easy and rewarding to give up. Gary's methods are far reaching. He has quiet confidence, obvious great experience in his field and his methods, I believe, could have a great impact on many areas of dysfunctional behaviour. I'm still astounded that the baggage I hauled around for so many years, which damaged me and so many people I loved for so long, has gone. I'm not managing it. Im not hiding it. Im not transferring the hurt onto anything else. It's just simply gone. Needless to say, I'm still so blown away by the changes in me and I think that Gary's methods should be used extensively as there are so many people who could benefit so much from letting the past go. The day I left Gary's office feeling so light and feeling like a cloud had cleared was one of the very best of my adult life. I very much wish I had found Gary many years ago."
— Jess 2016 Cheltenham
Gary has a gift to give our angry world.
"Gary has a gift to give our angry world. It is the gift of understanding our anger - why, when and how we get angry - and empowerment to take control of our own lives by simply disallowing anger from manifesting itself in actions that are detrimental to ourselves and those around us. Gary recognises that we cannot cure anger and indeed that anger is a healthy, natural human response. We cannot eliminate it completely and we should not expect to... however, by recognising our anger in the very moments that it takes its dark hold on us, and by recognising that our actions in the next moments can cause us more pain, more anger; we can overcome the negative effects of anger and truly free ourselves from an angry life. No good can come from hurling your internal anger at someone else, even if you believe that person has caused your internal pain - I have learned that the hard way. Turning anger into incendiary bombs only incites more anger. Anger expressed poorly spreads like wildfire between people and the internal flames can only burn hotter when anger is unleashed. My own anger is explosive and has severely damaged my relationships, my family, my lifestyle and my outlook. Gary’s revolutionary new system has helped me to overcome my angry ways using just 4 words. The simplest of solutions can emerge from great underlying complexity and analysis. Gary has devoted his career to understanding the triggers and solutions for managing anger and has arrived at a 4 word solution, abbreviated to 4 letters: RIPP. To me, the 4 words and the techniques that surround them have great depth. They appeal to my intellect, my spirit and my heart. They are extremely powerful when used correctly and consistently. When you find yourself in the fiery chasms of an anger response, the awareness of Gary’s teachings summarised as “RIPP” is all you need to harmonise your mind, body and spirit and find inner peace when it matters most. By condensing all the complexities of anger management into “RIPP”, Gary has achieved a method that is pragmatic and realistic in the moment when our conscious mind is at its most unsettled and least likely to get a grip. Rather than explode, we instead find that we can internally state “I am RIPPing” and that alone is enough to trigger the anger to subside - to allow us to accept our anger, restore calm and explore alternate, more productive ways of expressing our anger. Gary is a master of promoting self-awareness in the very moment of anger surfacing and providing effective tooling to dissipate anger and avoid the inevitable aftermath that anger so often inflicts. Gary can teach you how to turn anger into peace with his techniques. RIPP is a simple solution. However, the simplest of solutions can emerge from great underlying complexity and analysis... and more importantly, the simplest solution possible is what we truly need in the most chaotic moments of an impending explosion. Being able to utter RIPP in my mind is far more effective than any other tool or technique I have encountered for dealing with anger. I cannot recommend Gary’s teachings enough for anyone who has suffered from their anger response and wants to free themselves from an angry life."
— Adam T, Ireland July 2018
For the first time in many years I felt there would be an end to these out of control bursts of temper and rage.
"Gary was recommended to me by a friend as I was having increasing issues within my relationship and with my family. I felt nervous leading up to the initial meeting but Gary’s ability to listen and explain reasons why I could be experiencing this constant rage made me feel better even after the first session. I left feeling an immediate relief from the stress of my anger and anxiety. For the first time in many years felt that there would be an end to these out of control bursts of temper and rage. In the second meeting I was amazed at how quick we got the cause of my explosive anger, it was an unbelievable feeling, it’s difficult to describe the instant sense of freedom that I felt, it was as if a knot had been released in my stomach, a knot I didn’t even realise had been there for 20 years! Gary’s ability to get to the reason for my erratic and frightening emotions so very quickly and his way of explaining complex behavioural patterns has made it easy for me to understand my reactions and enables me to visualise these emotions so they something I can now control. I now know why I used to react the way I did but more importantly, moving forward, it has made it easy for me to recognise potential triggers and situations. I now have the tools to break these cycles, I stay calm, realistic and positive where before I would have struggled to stay in control – these tools are invaluable and have changed my life. For the first time ever I have been able to put my past in my past and be excited for mine and my family’s future. I needed to get control for the sake of my young son; I didn’t ever want him to see me when I lost control. I am free from a dark cloud and the feeling can only be described as total elation! This has been an incredible journey for me I still cannot believe I have only seen Gary three times. I am forever grateful as he has given me my life back and would recommend to anyone to go and see him."
— Hannah Cheltenham May 2015
I have come away with clear and reliable ways to make sure this change is permanent.
"Gary, Firstly, thank you for your help with my anger issues. I’m confident now that you have helped me to make the changes that I have needed to make for years. I’m very glad that I came to see you and that I’ve chosen not to let any more of those years go by while my relationships suffer. Your method appears to be deceptively simple: all it seemed to need from me was honesty and a will to make a change. You told me when we first met that this would be the case, and that things would improve surprisingly quickly. You were right. And I have come away with what feels like clear and reliable ways to make sure this change is permanent. I would not hesitate to recommend you to anyone. Thanks again, and best wishes."
— Mr. SA Cirencester 2015
The rage at perceived injustices disappeared in a very short space of time.
"I didn’t know what to expect when I first visited Gary. I guess I was going to “lie on the couch” and talk about myself whilst he passively listened, delivered his rehearsed spiel, gave me some cognitive behaviour exercises, blah, blah, blah. Having had some previous experience and preconceived ideas, I was sceptical to say the least. Well, all I can say is, that didn’t happen! It was very much a two-way discussion. As Gary said to me, it’s not necessarily talking about things you don’t want to talk about, but also hearing things that you might not want to hear. This was not in the form of negative criticism, but rather busting open long held perceptions and behaviours. It’s not that Gary told me how and what to think and do, I would have hated that, he only told me why I think and do things the way I do. This helped me to understand my inner frustrations and turmoil, by giving me some surprising insights into where my perceptions and reactions come from. Equally as importantly, and as a result of this, it has helped me to modify my outward reactions. He has helped me to learn “to engage my brain before putting my mouth into gear”. It has also enabled me to realise that others have certain conditioned thoughts and reactions, which are inevitably going to be different to mine. This has given me an empathy with others that I have never had before. Due to this simple education, the rage at perceived injustices, that was always just below the surface, has disappeared in a very short space of time. It’s not that it's just been suppressed, but quite simply, has vanished completely and I have attained an inner peace that I would not have thought possible just a short time ago. Perhaps most surprisingly, it has been a pleasurable and enlightening experience and I now have a hunger to not only discover more about myself, but about others too. A little knowledge is a very powerful thing."
— Patrick Wilson. Cheltenham 2016
Gary’s methods enabled me to save myself and my family from the upset my temper caused.
"Running a small but stressful business I found my self becoming more unable to cope with home life after a days work. I would loose my temper over trivial issues and I was unable to let go and move on from them. Gary's methods which he has named RBR enabled me to stop and think about why I was losing my temper and made me realise that there was no need for it and made me able to deal with my temper and save myself and my family from the upset it caused. I would recommend RBR to anyone who feels that they cannot cope with stress or who is finding themselves losing their temper unnecessarily. RBR has been hugely beneficial to myself and my family."
— Mr A.T. Gloucester 2014
It’s like having a weight lifted from your shoulders.
"After a blow to the head in a car accident my ability to control my temper was completely gone. My Fiancée was about to finish with me as I was shouting at her constantly and she couldn't take any more. Gary was able to help me deal with my anger and with his help I am completely cured, it's like having a weight lifted from your shoulders. His way of dealing with the anger is simple but very effective and I can't thank him enough for the changes he's helped me make."
— Mr J.C. Bristol 2014
I wish I’d met him thirty years ago.
"I sought Anger Management when I realised that throughout my life I had been a fundamentally angry person. The realisation finally occurred after another relationship broke down because of my angry outbursts. Anger up to this point had ruined my life! In my first meeting with Gary, he identified the childhood cause of my condition and the reason for my subsequent behaviour pattern. In subsequent meetings he explored other aspects of my character that also had an impact on my anger. The process was all about understanding the cause and becoming aware of the triggers. It then felt like a very straight forward and simple process of dealing with these triggers differently and changing my life-long behaviour. I really feel different now. I am dealing with issues that previously would have caused anger and pain in a much more positive way. Gary`s methods are quite amazing in their simplicity. I wish I`d met him 30 years ago. Thank you Gary"
— Mr A.C. Cheltenham 2014
We are much happier at home and are getting on and doing activities together.
"I would not have visited Gary and undertaken the anger management sessions if my wife had not explained to me that I did not now have any choice if we wanted to stay together as a family. I guess that over the last 20 years I did not really feel I was the problem. It was always someone else’s fault when I flayed up and got angry with my family. I did however go to Gary with a totally open mind and a conviction that I would always tell the truth and accept the feedback however hard I might find it. From the very first session I was able to open up and discuss through Gary’s methods with honesty and I knew that this approach would really help. I was going to stop after a couple of sessions as I felt the issues had been discussed but my wife insisted that I continue. We did discuss each session at home afterwards and I came back to Gary with further revelations. In all I had 6 sessions with Gary. I am still unsure what he really did but I know he has transformed my life and my families and I am very grateful indeed. I am especially pleased that my children will at least see me in a new light before they go off to University and I can only hope that I will not have scared them too much. We are much happier at home and are getting on and doing activities together."
— Mr M.S. Cheltenham
I now understand the thought processes involved in the lead up to an outburst.
"I came to realise that through my anger I had become someone I did not want to be and that it had been affecting my relationship with my wife and family for some time. I knew a little about counselling which is why I chose to see Gary, however, his approach was not what I had assumed. Talking to Gary was like talking to a friend who understood exactly how I felt, and showed me how I was unconsciously setting the wheels in motion for an outburst. This came as a revelation to me, but now I understand the thought processes involved in the lead up to an outburst they no longer happen. I would definitely recommend this process as it is insightful and works in a very short space of time. Can I take this opportunity Gary to thank you for showing me a better way."
— Mr P.F. Gloucestershire
The time had come for this 45-year-old bloke to begin living a life I could only have ever dreamt about.
"A few months ago I found myself in an emotional state that was spiralling out of control rapidly. Failed relationships, rapidly increasing stress levels which was turning me into an angry man and a nightmare to live with. I had touched on my issues with GP but the free services she pointed out never returned a call or email…. Sign of the times I kept telling myself .be patient help will come to me eventually and these services were probably inundated with people with needs far greater than mine. After a good cry whilst driving to see my partner I decided right enough is enough. if the help won’t come to me I will find some before I find the hole I was sinking into gets too deep ….so I searched for somebody local who could possibly help. … it wasn’t long before I found the services of Gary Redmond…. I pondered and finally picked up courage to make that call. Upon dialling the phone was promptly answered and after a brief discussion I was offered an initial consultation followed by a course or alternatively get straight down to business on the first meeting. Well I chose the let’s get on with it I needed help and sooner the better. Meeting number one …. upon finding his office conveniently located in central Cheltenham I was greeted by Gary and warmly welcomed to his office … from this point onwards I was in very unknown territory. Nervous was an understatement! with myself sat in what can only be described as very comfy chair Gary began to change my life for ever. before long I was talking to him like a best friend everything just spilled out poor bloke must have thought what have I got here …. after what seemed an eternity the session drew to a close with Gary advising that a further five sessions would have me in a better place .as I left and to be honest was feeling rather strange. a nice strange a though something was happening to me but what was it. anyway I continued my regular sessions for a further two visits ……. then on the fourth visit I was asked to revisit a recent situation that USED to enrage my anger. however hard I tried the anger didn’t surface …. not even remotely! the time had come for this 45-year-old bloke to begin living a life I could only have ever dreamt about. So my advice to anybody who feels their life is spiralling downwards out of control get Gary details and make contact with him you won’t regret it! Ps before you think this is some sort of weird sales promotion it isn’t, it’s simply the truth."
— Mr I. A. Cheltenham 2016
One session with Gary changed my perception of anger for good.
"I always thought anger was part of 'me' an inherited characteristic. I was also very sceptical of 'counsellors'. One session with Gary - that's all - changed my perception of both for good. Gary's methods - nothing hypnotic or anything like that - are from my personal experience, unique, and highly effective."
— Dr Paul. Cheltenham May 2012
Finally, with patience, the penny dropped.
"Through a series of some six meetings Gary took me through a process to help me understand anger. Firstly to understand my anger and how it affected my life, health, and relationships. Finally with a great deal of patience he persisted until the penny dropped. I now feel have not only the ability to control and deal with issues that go back five decades or so but also to appreciate and enjoy life to the full in the future. I cannot thank Gary enough for what he has done for me and would have no hesitation in recommending his work."
— Mr T.I. Cheltenham
For the first time I was able to stand outside myself and witness what I do.
"Being successful in the business of developing people I was one of the last to think I could receive beneficial help from a counsellor. How wrong I was. For many years I was that counsellor – now I needed one myself. I had achieved my lifetime business goals by the age of fifty, retired one year later and just kept doing the occasional contract when I wanted to. Seemed like a happy situation to me. My marriage on the other hand was a completely different story. I was now living at home throughout the day and everyday. Very soon our relationship suffered and my anger management was non-existent. The smallest of things would trigger major arguments. We quickly became very unhappy and there seemed to be no answer. Parting was inevitable. My desperation pushed me to the computer and I asked Google for a “result orientated anger management counsellor in Cheltenham” – and Google responded with Gary in Cheltenham. I sent an email and a response came quickly via the phone. A few words on the telephone and we were soon discussing ‘the’ problems face to face. I thought they weren’t my problems at this stage – wrong again! At first it was awkward but soon, very soon, Gary steered the conversation to my problems and concerns – and how I could make things a lot easier for myself (and my loving wife). After our first meeting I was feeling a lot happier, my wife could see small positive changes and I felt highly motivated to make this change happen. Five meetings later I am a new man. The past is merely the past – I hardly think about it. For the first time I have been able to stand outside myself and witness what I do. For the first time I am able to control my ‘egoic thoughts’ and keep my fast thinking mind at bay. Everyone needs a friend to talk things through and in today’s fast moving ‘people don’t matter’ environment – and these friends can be hard to find. Talk to Gary about it – you will be surprised and definitely rewarded."
— Man 58. Gloucestershire UK
EVERY STORY IS DIFFERENT
Every testimonial on this page reflects one person's individual experience.
People arrive with different histories, different personalities and different goals, so no two journeys are ever exactly the same. My hope is not that you compare yourself with someone else's story, but that you recognise something of your own experience within it.
